Nothing like a little peace and quiet in the middle of the day to reflect.  Had one of those serious talks in the car this morning with my son on the way to school.  He usually waits till we are about five minutes from the school to start a deep discussion but this time as we sat at a redlight I could tell something was bothering him.  He said it bothered him that he felt he had been doing really good things lately and it was not being acknowledged.  These are the talks I dread but I know everytime we have then he is one step closer to becoming an adult.  First I asked if he felt I had not acknowledged his acts lately and he said I had but of course I am MOM and thats what we do.  Then I reminded him that unfortunately in life some people do good all the time and it never gets recognized.  That we do good things or excel in some areas of our life because we want that inner fulfillment not for praise.  Praise is nice and yes it is human nature to want to be praised or complimented for our actions but in the end we have to be content with us knowing we have done well.  All mom answers and not what he wanted to hear but he does understand.  As a parent I get torn between praising my son and helping to raise him self esteem but also toughening him up to the realities that face him in adult life.  I give everything I have to my job when I am working and not only do I get my work done by the deadlines I face but I am asked to help my coworkers who struggle to meet deadlines.  On an almost daily basis I am working in someone elses department taking me away from my own and there is no pat on the back at the end of the day.  But I do it because it needs to be done.  So the harshness of life shows itself a little more each day to my little guy (he would kill me if he knew I still refer to him as that) and all I can do is be there to give advise if needed or just lend an ear.  My stepchildren were 5 and 7 when they came into my life and their parents had already been split for several years.  They had not only been witness to the breakup of their parents marraige but their mothers following relationship as well and by the time I met them they were already fully aware that life held no guarantees or promises.  It is what it is.  I have always liked the comparison in the movie Parenthood to a roller coaster.  Up and down,up and down,scary as hell one minute but when its over you want more.  If you can have a good laugh have it.  Ending this on a more comic note(adult content here) as my young man was getting ready for school and I was going through the morning ritual of telling him every five minutes what he should be doing he erupted from the bathroom and announced, Mom, I was taking a wiz ( he loves his colorful expressions). Then as I apologized for rushing him he said You don't want me to jiz in my pants do you.  Needless to say I stopped cold in my tracks and said Huh?  He repeated the sentence.  Trying not to be too freaked out by hearing that from my son I opened my bedroom door and guided him in to where my husband was sitting on the bed,looked at my husband and said PLEASE explain the difference between the word wiz and jiz...and then quickly walked out of the room before I heard my son yelling EEEwwwww from behind the door.  I am confident I will not be hearing that word from his mouth again.  Oh the joys of raising a son.