Haven't killed any relatives today.

It is rainy and gloomy and dark out today, the kind of weather I normally love because it inspired introspection but seems to just have everyone (especially my sweetie) in a funk.  I am just feeling helpless since my son came home with more math work today that might as well be written in Chinese because I never came close to that level in school. And he is only in 8th grade.  Poor boy is screwed.  It wouldn't be so bad but he is harder on himself than anyone else is and I hate to see him beat himself up over this stuff.  Work is going well but today the supervisors were given the paperwork to fill out basically stating where we want to be in the next year. What our goals are.  Do we want to push to move up in the company or maybe branch out and learn other parts of the company other than what we specialize in.  UUuuugggggg!  I hate this stuff.  There is a part of me that wants to write that I am still looking for a position in the company that requires the LEAST amount of work for the most amount of pay possible. LOL I don't think my manager would see the humor in that like I do.  I know that these things are good to do if anything to keep us from getting complacent in our positions but I really am not in a state of mind to be thinking of my future with this company.  Or my future in any way I guess.  Still feeling post vacation don't give a shit attitude and even feeling a little bulletproof right now.  Hopefully I can bite my tongue till that passes.  The last couple times it has rained it was a sunny clear sky kind of rain and I watched from the window.  Today is one of the moods I want to run outside barefoot and play in it and that's all cool but the amount of lightening is making me rethink that idea and I hate feeling like I have to choice but to behave myself.  Of course there is always a choice but I don't think living or becoming a human lightening rod is that hard of a choice.  This morning was delightful with all the rain since the a/c and heat is kaput in my car.  If you wanna know what a redneck defroster/defogger is it is rolling down your car windows in the rain to keep the windshield from fogging over only to get your passenger side seat soaked.  Rented Silver Linings Playbook from the redbox on the way home which I have been eager to watch.  Not just because of who is in it but mostly because of the subject matter.  What I am afraid of seeing is a whitewashed Hollywood take on a potentially raw subject.  I hope that isn't the case.  It would be nice to see a movie about these kind of issues and feel like someone actually gets it.  I guess I will see shortly. It hasn't cracked any lightening for a while maybe I could pop outside for a moment.